Since we have moved here and met tons of new people, I am asked the same daunting question quite often, "What are your hobbies?" Seems painless enough, right? Not for someone who really doesn't have any "skills". I wish I was artsy and I try often, but it never seems to work out. I can put together awesome ideas in my head, but I can never get them to turn out right. I will of course keep trying, but it never makes me feel very good about myself. That question really has made me think of what I really like to do with my free time and I figured it out. I just love people. I would rather spend time with my family or friends than by myself painting or gardening. Though I wish I could paint and I wish I had a green thumb, at the moment, it's not me.
Now in realizing this I am slightly confused by what God has laid on my heart to do with my life. I love my family, why do I keep moving farther away from them? I love my friends, why do I make it hard for them to come visit me? I never thought of myself as the type of person that would get homesick, but I have never been sick without my mom somewhere close by and I have always had close friends to keep me preoccupied. Now, I have no family close and the people we have met here are awesome so far, but we are still getting to know them. From here on out it is going to get harder. I still can speak the same language as all these people and the culture is quite similar, but it won't always be that way. We are going to keep moving further and further away from "normal" life.
Brion and I want to some day move into a remote group of people who have never heard the gospel. I know that because of my heart and love for people, this passion will never die. I hope that one day I will look back after years of living in the tribe and understand why God gave me this heart. I hope that I will be able to love those people like they are my family and I hope that they will learn to trust and love us as well. I also hope that even after we leave I will know that we will have all eternity to spend together.
I guess that is what it all boils down to, living life with an eternal perspective. It's hard for me to be away from my sisters that I am so close to. My parents who love and care deeply about me. My awesome friends who make me laugh. Our two great church bodies that I love and care for. All of these people that I am thinking about and thanking God for right now, I know that we will have an eternity together in Heaven. What an amazing promise that we will all be together forever. I have to lean on that. I have to keep that in the front of my mind. I know that God is using all of these people in unique ways, just as He is using Brion and I. What an honor to be a messenger and light of Christ.
