Thankful

I know last week was thanksgiving, but I just have so much to be thankful for today. For the past 3 months I have been very sick. It was really hard for me to have a good outlook on things and be really excited to have this baby when I couldn't keep any food down. BUT God is so good and His mercies are new every morning. I have been able to go to almost all my classes, I was able to help out with work program in the afternoon and I have been able to go to more social events! I was so energized the other day. I had made it to all my classes and work program and I found out one of our friends on campus is expecting a baby 3 weeks after me. I was going crazy that night! (You can ask Brion and he'll tell you how nuts I really am)

Anyway, whether we are throwing up everything we eat or waking up feeling full of energy, God is working in us regardless. We can learn so much in our down times if we just listen. It's hard to be thankful when things aren't going as we planned them, but it helps remind us that we are not in control. Our plans are not always the best thing for us. I would not wish morning (or all day) sickness on anyone, but I had to depend on God for absolutely everything and I think it was a good lesson for me. It was also awesome to see Brion's willingness to do everything around the house and I am even more thankful that God put such an awesome, godly man in my life.

I am thankful for God and how wonderful He truly is to us. I am thankful for my amazing, diligent, hard-working, loving, husband. I am thankful for the little sweat pea growing inside me and the privilege Brion and I have of soon becoming parents. I am thankful for the wonderful family that I have and the family that I married into. I am thankful for the friends that I have had for ages and for the new ones that we have just made in the past few months.

It is hard being away from family, especially because I am growing into this huge person and none of them get to see it, but I am so glad that God brought us to Canada. Even though it is really hard going through some of this stuff without them, this is where God wants us and I have never been more sure of anything in my life.

God is good all the time. I am so happy that I finally feel like a human being again. I am also happy that I was able to snag some free maternity pants from our mission barrel, because I can't even try to rubber band my pants shut anymore! God is always faithful to us and He knows exactly what we need, when we need it. We serve a Mighty God!

Baby Kendo

Week 17 :)

I feel like I have gotten a lot bigger in the last 2 weeks! But still not very noticeable for other people I think.

Crazy Lady!

I think I have turned into a crazy person! Last week it came to my attention that I would have to make a baby registry way sooner than I thought I would. This really freaked me out because I know nothing about baby products and even what we will all need. But I just decided to call my sister (Jess, you really are a lifesaver!) and get it taken care of. After doing some research online and talking to my amazing sister, I began my registry.

I'm really not much of one for staring at the computer screen for long periods of time, so this was a bit rough for me. Oh and you may be asking yourself, "why did she have to do it on the computer?". Well, living in Canada does have it's downfalls. No Target. So after about 4 hours on the computer I felt so exhausted and a bit nervous that I picked the right stuff.

This all doesn't seem crazy does it? Well, lets just say that I'm a bit obsessed now. I keep going on Target.com to check and make sure everything I put on my registry is still there and the internet people didn't delete it. I also have gotten a bit diaper crazy. We have decided on cloth diapering our children for cost and environmental sake. Now, I want to blame my dear friend Katie for getting me so excited about cloth diapers, but I guess that's not very nice of me. So I'll blame my crazy pregnant hormones.

Who gets excited about what they are going to put on their baby's butt? Who gets excited about what they are going to spray off poopy diapers with? Who gets excited about what they are going to put their dirty diapers in? Well, me apparently. I go on this website called Nicki's diapers all the time and I don't even know why I do. Maybe it's just the thought of having a baby to put the diaper on. Who knows!

What all this boils down to is that I have a new obsession: anything baby. I would be so happy putting together a crib, putting up curtains and pre-washing a bunch of cloth diapers right at this moment.  I can only see this getting worse, so if anyone has any advice for me, I will gladly take it! We still have quite a while to wait for our baby to come out, but I am just so darn excited.

I am going to just try and relax and enjoy the rest of this pregnancy, but I think I might need some prayers for patience :) I'll put up another baby picture very soon. We are on week 17 or for people that haven't gone through pregnancy stuff yet, about four months!

Baby Kendo

Here we are at 15 weeks :) I don't have a head, but trust me, it's still there.

Still feeling sick most days, but I have hope that very, very soon we'll be doing just fine.

Provision

Told in one of our classes we were talking about God's provision for us. We were talking about Abraham and Isaac. Not only did God provide Isaac in such an incredible way, but He provided a situation for Abraham to prove his faithfulness to God. God asked Abraham to sacrifice his son, that he loved very dearly, and Abraham did not even hesitate.

I was thinking about this today in class and wondered how much I am willing to sacrifice for God and how often is my trust 100% complete in Him. Before we moved to Canada, finances were never really an issue for me. I was raised to work hard and save my money. As soon as I did move out and got married, God always provided a steady job. So in leaving our life in Arlington Heights and moving to Canada with no job and no stable income, I was slightly nervous, but excited to see how God would provide.

Today after sitting through class, amazed at the trust Abraham had and how God continually provided for him, I was just really excited. It may have been that I actually made it through class without leaving to throw up, but I was really in awe of God. So here are Brion and I, sitting in our house. Me watching friends and Brion on his computer playing video games and our doorbell rings. Now my first thought is, SHOOT, it's trick-or-treaters and they came to our door and we don't have candy for them!!! Brion's idea is to ignore the doorbell. Well, then they knocked. They obviously knew we were in here.... Brion went to break the bad news while I hid under the covers pouting. Turns out it was a couple from our church that we attend here. They had a huge box of stuff for us, I mean HUGE. They brought us Francine Rivers books, potatoes and ham, a humidifier (the dryness has really been bothering Brion), a baby blanket (which I may or may not have been snuggling with the whole night), cookbook, candy, flowers, magazines on parenting and some other stuff. I was floored. I teared up going through all the stuff, especially when we got to the baby blanket.

Ok, so I probably didn't have to go through all of that here on this page, but I am just so astounded. Since we have moved here, people have been showering us with love and kindness and food! God knows what we need and He provides. ALWAYS. I am shocked. I feel undeserving, but God doesn't care. He knows exactly what we need and He provides always.

I always tell myself that I won't write so much, but God is great and I guess I just couldn't keep this in. I hope this encourages someone. God knows your needs and He will meet them. I have so much to be thankful for!!

Whoa Baby

This was Written a few days ago....

Today is a beautiful day. Sure it may be raining, cold, windy and destroying all the fall leaves, but it is a wonderful day. Today Brion and I got to hear our baby's heartbeat. What a miracle. Instant tears in my eyes. I am so overjoyed. So excited that I couldn't even take a nap, which these days seem crucial at times. In six short months Brion and I will become parents. What a beautiful blessing and responsibility God has given us! These past six weeks of nausea were all worth it for the thirty seconds of  hearing baby's heartbeat this morning. To know that God knows everything about this tiny person inside me is just incredible. Needless to say, I am one very happy lady today :)

The Perfect Fool

I am such a fool. Who am I to question my Heavenly Father and what He thinks is best for me? I go through a small trial and wonder why God made me go through this. The timing seems so wrong and so unfair. Sometimes I am surprised at how small my faith is. I question the reasoning behind the trials, but I already know the answer. James explains to us that the trials we go through help us develop perseverance.

Just 15 minutes ago I was asking God why. Why this. Why now. I am so tired and just want relief. Here I am, having a pity party for myself, and I hear a knock at our door. I go answer it and there is someone standing with a loaf of bread for me. (She also gave me her leftover lasagna for Brion and I for dinner tonight!) My relief is in Him, He is my refuge and my strength.

SLAP IN THE FACE

I think thats what God was trying to do, but it was with His blessing. Who am I to question my Maker, my Master. He has blessed me so richly and always provides for my needs. First of all He gave me a wonderful husband who has been taking such great care of me. He has used so many people around us to shower us with their wisdom and wonderful cooking. He has used my sisters and my friends to lift my spirits. So why do I still question Him? I am such a fool, but God loves me anyway. When I am weak, He makes me strong. I could be looking at this time of hardship as a blessing, but sometimes that is just so hard to do when we're in the thick of it.

All this to say, I'm feeling a bit humbled today. God has me in the palm of His hand and that is the perfect place to be. I need to just trust Him and learn to be content right where He has me!